Yesterday, I took a walk through the woods, fields, and sandy areas around the house. Near the end of my stroll, I chose a path that leads through a wooded area that runs between two fields. I remembered the special meaning this path had: last winter, I had struggled with God there (see previous post titled "Ashamed of my Prideful Unbelief. Amazed by His Wonderful Work). Our wills clashed, and I felt as if His hand were trying to pierce me to pull out my will. I remember it all so clearly. As my arguments turned from valid to weak, His goodness and wisdom shined through my dark thoughts, just as the bright sun rays were casting their beam upon the frozen countryside even through the thick winter clouds. I remember it all so clearly.
Then, suddenly, I decided my will really wasn't worth it. I decided I should let Him win.
By then, I had reached that same path I was on yesterday. I paused under the leafless trees and wrote on a note-card words of loving surrender to a Father who knows best. I could not see the future, but suddenly I knew my lack did not matter since He owns the cattle across a thousand hills. I did not have all the answers, but my clueless heart was insignificant because He knows the beginning and the end. Fear became futile; running away became an option no more; His way meant life, joy, and His presence -no matter what this world threw me.
Now, that wooded area is full of blackberries -the bushes are literally COVERED. My mom and I could probably make enough blackberry pies to feed a thousand.
I need to remember that: the surrendering of my will always brings the showering of God's blessing -no, not always in material ways, in healing, in deliverance, or in the seen. But He always rewards with His presence, His revelation of Himself as never before, a closer walk with Him in JOY and TRUE LIFE that is full of strength and grace. He gives our souls reasons to sing.
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