Grateful for this Season

I have always been captivated by the riveting story of Esther: her story of survival and courage in a culture that despised all she held dear is commendable…and a chilling reminder that we are only a breath away from having to face some of the same decisions and consequences in our lives, whether we realize it or not, or whether we believe that they have the same consequences that Esther’s did. In the last few days, I began a more in-depth study of this book through a plan that selects very few verses at a time and links them to a verse in another book. Since the plan offers no hints to their correlation, I, in my go-getter mind, have more than enjoyed the challenge.

On the beginning day, the first pair intrigued me: how could Esther 1:1-4 be linked to Matthew 6:9-21? The Lord began to draw the lines between the dots for me, leaving me in awe at the deepness of the Scriptures once unseen to me. As I continued into the study, the theme of idolatry began to stand out.

It’s easy to believe that idolatry only involves the worship of stone or wooden sculptures. It is easy to believe that we are not breaking one of God’s highest commandments.

Yet, idolatry comes in much more subtle forms too. It creeps in when we are not paying attention, stunting our growth in the Lord, robbing our full attention from His gaze, and warping our passions into our self-glorification. I don’t know where King Xerxes’s idolatry began –perhaps it was in self-absorption, or in his riches and possessions, or in making his genealogy proud. But by the time of his life displayed in Esther 1, it has become so prevalent. Portrayed as a man consumed with his well-being, his welfare before the people, and his riches, Xerxes appears to have it all –including the power to deem what is right or wrong. In fact, at his week-long party, he encourages his guests to do anything they please (v. 10 –strangely reminiscent of Judges 17:6 and 21:25).

But idolatry weakens our hearts, minds, and souls and opens the doors to other sins too. Once we remove God from all or specific parts of our lives, things start to fall apart. When I consider some of my biggest mistakes and failures, I realize that it was when God was no longer my priority: spending time in His Word was on the back-burner, praying was a mumbled last-minute guilt-trip, and accountability with other believers was inexistent.

Xerxes’ life follows this trend: his idolatry opened the door to so much distress. In verses 9-18, the king loses any form of discernment or self-control. Not only does Xerxes lack the discernment to see what calling for Vashti could do to compromise her honorable identity as queen, but he also exhibits strong lack of self-control in her stand against him: instead of quietly dismissing the matter or recognizing his error, he becomes enraged before turning to warped advice: leaving Vashti unpunished will result in national chaos. We know what then happens to Vashti…she is divorced and replaced.

Idolatry has consequences –on us and on other people.

Idolatry can come in the most subtle manners, and as I reflect on decisions for my future, I am so thankful that God has moved me to start recognizing idolatry, its dangers, and its hindering consequences. Putting God first-place is definitely not an easy choice. BUT IT IS WORTH IT. I am so glad He chastens me and removes things from my life because He loves me too much to allow me lesser things, including a distorted relationship with Him. Psalm 73 was quoted in a sermon I heard on Sunday, so I looked more at the context: the Psalmist was devastated by the seeming victories of evil doers –and felt worthless before God in light of his own failures. Yet, he was able to find hope in God and His grace. Truly walking by faith comes to a whole new level when you realize your relationship with Jesus is the only thing you have that will last forever –nothing else is everlasting: not your possessions, not your relationships, not your popularity, nor your health or success.  

Sometimes, God allows pain so that it will draw us closer to Him. He allows punishment for us, His sons and daughters through the blood of Christ. He closes doors when we don’t have the strength to do so ourselves. Even when evil seems to prosper and causes us to be envious of its prosperity, we must remember its victories are NOT forever. Our GOD is enough.

In closing, I must summarize thoughts I heard in a sermon on the radio this evening. Paul went through similar seasons in life as we did, except perhaps on a much more pronounced level at times. In II Cor. 12, he explains that God had granted him a special revelation…but had also allowed a “thorn in the flesh” to keep Paul humble –and boastful only in Christ. This attitude is how we should view our pain, our trials, and our challenges in our lives: opportunities to stay humble, to removes our forming idols, and to only glorify our LORD. “For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong” (v. 10). Each time I go through trial or pain, it seems that it only reaches deeper into my soul, affects me more strongly, or challenges my faith like never before –but I know it also strengthens me as I never dreamed and trains my human eyes to see His unseen and to become closer to His heart. As the radio preacher stated so powerfully, “The pain keeps you humble and His strength brings victory despite it.” As difficult as it is to admit or type this, I know I must be GRATEFUL for these seasons of pain, trial, unknown, and endurance –because they are also seasons of growth in my Savior.